Chasing dreams

Have you ever been happy without any reason? You are just in a good mood. To an extent that you feel good even when you are missing someone. All the bad things happening to you or around you don't really seem significant. All the good things feel normal. It's like reaching in a space where things are just the way they should be. Nothing else matters. You can reach there after you have found what you were looking for.

Funny thing is, what you look for keeps changing. Today you desire something, tomorrow something else. It can be a person, or a goal, or a state of mind - it can be anything. Some people call it destination, some desire, some dream, some purpose; but almost all of us live for it. Imagine how life would be without any purpose? You wake up for nothing, work for nothing, survive for nothing.

How amazing it is that we live to stay alive. Ultimately that's the purpose for the most. Some end their life when they realise that they do not have any reason or purpose to live. I think they are the bravest of all. I cannot tolerate even a small cut on myself, forget suicide. But I'm not scared of dying either.

As usual many conversations happen every day that make you introspect. At my age, when most my friends are busy changing the nappies of their children, the rest of us talk about how things have changed. How we loathe facebook feed these days because of the perfect picture friends try to create through photographs. But they are not happy. They still seek happiness in other things, one of them being sharing pictures. Of various trips, and celebrations. Moods and people they socialise with. 

I post pictures too, but I don't remember the last time I uploaded an album of a particular event. I have done that in the past. Due to peer pressure. People I travelled with used to remind me every second day whether I had uploaded the pictures or not. Whether I had tagged them or not. After uploading those pictures, first three days used to go in replying to comments of those tagged in the pictures. We discussed where, how and when we got that picture clicked. We relived those moments again. And we discussed about these comment threads when we met. 

Now everyone knows I don't upload albums. I dump all the pictures in a picasa album and share the link with those present in those pictures. They download the pictures and treat them the way they want to. Life feels better that way. Do I feel jealous of those having an awesome album life? Maybe, or maybe not. But nothing in my life changes by uploading or not uploading an album. I am happy or not happy - I know that. I don't have anything against album uploaders. They are awesome. I just cannot be as awesome.

These days I have a new addiction - Instagram. I like to share pictures there. It's a kind of picture blog for me. I don't have mind blowing clicks there, but each one has a story. Just like this blog, it's a record of events. And memories. 

I haven't changed, I realised. So many major things keep happening in life. Some life changing moments take place. But somewhere you still remain there. The same person. When you are at certain places. Like this blog. The header, the content, the flow - nothing has any relevance whatsoever. But still it feels good to write. And it reads superb to me. Just like a hit blog post. Something that looks good on this space. I'm sure it will remain that way even in the future.