The Archive effect

How often do you read your own old posts? Or do you even read your archives? I do. Especially the posts of the current month for the previous years. And it gives me different feeling - there is nothing happy or sad about it - it's just different.

And every time I think that I used to write well. I lack that flow, that touch now. I lack the topics, the flow, the style - everything. I rant, talk about same things again and again. And still people read me and comment. And I am sure I am repeating this too Nth time. Anyway I know I am hopeless like that and will always be this way.

So yes, the archive - the first post, second post, tenth post. Then comes the readers, and you become conscious - about formatting, language, content, topic - everything. You start writing for readers and comments. You start reading for readers and comments. The phase lasts for a few months - your writing is still good, but you ain't entirely yourself.

And then the realization hits you. You become yourself again. You restrict your reading list, stop commenting everywhere. Your readers drop, comment numbers drop. Now you are back to being yourself to a greater extent, but you have kind of lost interest from blogging. Good or bad, the readers did motivate you to write a post on every third day. These days your blog is dormant for days. You don't have anything in drafts. You have a lot to blog about, but it's all the same. Same rants, same achievements, same people and the same you.

You still write it - once in a week, or ten days. The same thing, without bothering, for you have hardly any reader who reads you. Those who do know about you and they are happy reading it. And it makes you all the more happy, for people who matter to you read you and share your life.And the interest comes back. You again start enjoying blogging.

It's not only about reading your archive. Read the old posts of the bloggers you like. There are a few people here whose posts I have read. Each and every post. From day one. And it's such a wonderful journey. You travel with them from beginning to end. You see them evolve as writers. You realize that they are more or less like you, and yet so different from you. And you realize that you connect somewhere, the reason why you are even at their archives reading 3 or 4 years old post.

It is amazing to see the growth of you as a writer. As a blogger. And as a person. You realize how you felt two years back about something and where you are now. And it's possible when you write for yourself. Write about what you feel and what you think. Write your thoughts, write your feelings. And blogging becomes beautiful. Something you don't feel obliged to do, but something you would want to do whenever possible.